Give Yourself C.R.E.D.I.T.

The 6-Step Antidote to Beating Yourself Up

We’ve all been there. “I can’t believe I did that,” “I can’t believe I did it again” “I could kick myself.” You may have done the “it” so often that you’ve given up and consider yourself a failure. It’s amazing to me what a sense of right and wrong we have within us that drives these strong feelings. The list of offenses could be a mile long: lies, cheating, pet peeves like tardiness; gossiping, being on social-media for hours, over-eating, overspending, over-drinking, self or partner betrayal, etc.

Left unchecked they can result in:

The more we churn the issue in our minds, the deeper we get mired in it. Worse yet, not only does the main external problem remain unsolved, but it spawns venomous babies that start to eat at us internally.

C.R.D.I. is a simple acronym you can apply today to help you or a loved one stop unproductive self-punishment in its tracks.

1. CONFESS. This is a two-fold term. Its Greek translation homologeo means “one word.”

• The first aspect of confession therefore, is to agree with or to be on the same page. It is mental assent of the correctness of a matter. It is a deep inner process of realization and agreement. It is pure and simple at its core and devoid of justification, blame, minimizing, and other such behaviors.
• Secondly, to confess is to verbally profess, “I did that.” You would say it to yourself and you would say it to someone else such as a friend, a priest, or God. The more you say it, within reason, the more impactful it is when done right. This part is like dynamite to the structures of pretense that we can erect self-protection. This is not an invitation to a pity party. It is to be done with maturity and humility. It is an admission that you are human and that you desire to improve.

Keep confession simple and pure, “I did it.” Keep it void of blaming, minimizing, or justifying.

2. RENOUNCE. When I ran an adult care home, I cared for portly Mr. Freck. He wore adult diapers and passionately hated having them changed. He would get comfortable in those dirty briefs regardless of the stench. “It’s not that bad,” he would say. “Besides, I’m not done. I’ll probably need to go again in a couple of hours.” Thanks to Freck, I can now be the head trainer of the FBI hostage negotiation department. We too can get comfortable in the warm, stinky messes we create. It can seem like too much work to change, moreover, heaven knows we’re not done.

To renounce is to reject or refuse. It too, entails mental and verbal aspects. It is to divorce yourself from the behavior instead of coddling or fostering it. It is to think and say, “This habit of lying isn’t serving me. I’m done with it,” or “I’m done trying to control people. That is not my place.”

3. EMOTE. Allow yourself to feel the emotions. Feel and acknowledge the anger, the embarrassment, the guilt, the fear, the shame. Process them instead of suppressing or denying them. Processing hard emotions is crucial for mental and emotional well-being. When individuals acknowledge and work through difficult emotions such as grief, anger, or sadness, they can prevent these feelings from festering and causing long-term harm. Suppressing or ignoring hard emotions can lead to increased stress, anxiety, and even physical health issues. Allow yourself to experience and process these emotions so you can gain a deeper understanding of yourself and your experiences. This can lead to personal growth, improved relationships, and an overall sense of emotional resilience. Additionally, processing hard emotions can help individuals develop healthier coping mechanisms and problem-solving skills, enabling them to navigate future challenges more effectively.

4.DECLARE. To declare is to announce, report, or rehearse. It is vital to brain-based learning processes that one verbalize desired behavioral outcomes. Find truths that you want to embrace and apply them to yourself. Chose to believe a new thing about yourself and who you are. Holy Spirit has given you the power to transform your mind and behavior. Take to heart the passage that says, “I believed; therefore I have spoken.” Since we are of that same spirit of faith, we also believe and therefore speak.” 2 Corinthians 4:13. “You will also declare a thing and it shall be established for you; so light will shine on your ways,” Job 22:28.

“I used to be a latnik, but now I arrive fifteen minutes early to work and events,” “I used to cheat on my wife, but I am now a faithful husband,” “I used to gossip, but now I pray for people instead.”

Declare truth over yourself and over those you love.

4. IMPLEMENT. Learning new habits and behaviors can take a long time. In my book Napping in Delilah’s Lap – the Pandemic of Pornography in the Pew & the Pulpit (click on the title to purchase), I establish that the brain needs hundreds, even thousands of attempts to master new skills. Old pathways must be erased and new ones established. This is especially true when established neural pathways have to be abolished. It took a long to establish the harmful patterns, so it will take a long time to eradicate them, and then to replace them.

Fortunately, believers have the added, incredible presence and power of Holy Spirit to aid the process. In fact, He frequently performs dramatic transformations in people, for example my deliverance and that of my mother as I shared in the book.

6. TESTIFY/TEACH. There is much power in testifying. We don’t do it enough even though scripture commands it in several places. We testify for numerous reasons. Here are a few:

• It pleases God when we brag on Him
• It encourages and challenges others. I would think, “Well, if He’s doing good for you, I want some of that too.”
• It perpetuates an expectation of more good things.

“Oh, give thanks to the Lord!
Call upon His name;
Make known His deeds among the peoples!
Sing to Him, sing psalms to Him;
Talk of all His wondrous works!

Psalm 105:1, 2

Teach someone this strategy. Teach your kid or grandkid, teach your partner, a co-worker. Teach it to the next person who beats themself up in your presence. Consider that God has strategically sent them to you and now you’re prepared. Offer them a CREDIT card.

I’ve created a free download for your convenience.

• Print it on a stiff sheet of paper.
• cut it into individual cards.
• carry them around, ready to hand out. Print it now at furtherthefaith.com/credit.

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God will give you a thousand opportunities a day to rewire your brain or renew your mind as Paul calls it in Romans 12. What does that look like?

• Practice, practice, practice C.R.E.D.I.T. (Confess, Renounce, Emote, Declare, Implement, & Testify/Teach)
• Ask for feedback.
• Expect to fail.
• Show yourself grace.
• Maintain high expectations of yourself.
• Surround yourself with positive influences.

Instead of beating yourself up, give yourself some C.R.E.D.I.T!

Call To Action (CAT):

Identify an area where you are beating yourself up. It could be recent or from the past. Walk yourself through the C.R.E.D.I.T process then comment below:

a. How did that process feel?

b. What was helpful about it?

c. What was hard about it?

d. What did God teach you?

e. Who can you share this article and process with?